Cassidy Clark had a panic attack after 'Survivor 43' finale result (2024)

She won three individual immunity challenges, including the final one of the season. She was part of a three-headed power alliance that appeared to be controlling the game at the merge. Everybody that came after her ended up having their torch snuffed, instigating the so-called "Cassidy Curse." None of it mattered.

In the end, Cassidy Clark could only muster up a single vote from the Survivor 43 jury (courtesy of former alliance partner James Jones) as she was shockingly defeated by Mike Gabler 7-1-0 (with Owen Knight receiving no votes) on Wednesday's season finale. Why did Cassidy not connect with the jury? How surprised was she by the result? And does she feel she was punished for not giving up her immunity to take on Jesse Lopez in fire? We asked Cassidy all that and more, including which votes she's surprised she did not get, and whether she feels Karla Cruz Godoy poisoned the jury against her. The result was an open, honest, and raw interview from the Survivor 43 runner-up. (Also make sure to read our finale recap and exit interview with Mike Gabler and finale Q&A's with Owen Knight, Jesse Lopez, and Karla Cruz Godoy.)

ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY: Listen, I was shocked by the jury result here. I certainly did not see it coming. How shocked were you?

CASSIDY CLARK: I was pretty shocked as well. I just felt like I had set myself up for the win. And I think even — between me and Owen — we were in awe. Good for Gabler — obviously I never want to take away from somebody's win. He really pulled that out. But yeah, I got to say I was a little surprised.

I know you were doing jury math before you walked into that final Tribal, so which votes surprised you the most?

I think I was surprised by Jeanine's vote, because Gabler had voted out her closest ally and consequentially ruined her game as well in a way. And then the fact that I didn't write Jeanine's name down — that was a part of the reason I was hoping to get her jury vote. But it was also because I didn't want to vote another woman out. And I talked a little bit about in the EW story that was out today.

So Jeanine, but I think Karla obviously surprised me as well, because we worked together the whole game and I thought she would be able to look past what went down in the last few days. And still I feel like if it had been her in that position and she had gotten me, I would've voted for her. I didn't understand. Her and Gabler didn't really have that close of a relationship out there, so I just didn't really understand. I felt like she was doing it as a last bit of revenge against me in a way.

They showed that scene where she basically is saying that she's going to tell the jury what she wants to tell them if you vote her out. Do you feel like she poisoned the jury against you, which she was threatening to do?

So she did threaten that, and then after I got out of the game, I can't remember who, but somebody mentioned to me that she had been speaking against me. And I'm not saying it's 100 percent true, but that was what I had heard from somebody who was at Ponderosa. And so it was really hard to hear that she couldn't just look at it and be like, "Damn you got me, good game" and still support me, because we have been allies the entire game. If that is the case, that's really unfortunate. I'm not going to speak for her and say that is 100 percent what happened, but that's just what I heard. So it was hard to come to terms with that.

What about when you were sitting there in the game and she's saying she's going to use that as a chip in the game. What was your reaction?

I was like, that's extremely petty. I thought that was not the kind of game I wanted to play. And I just felt like it was really dirty to try to do. She was throwing all types of insults and different things at me that whole day. The conversation was way more intense than what was shown. But yeah, she was basically like, "I'm going to make sure you don't take credit for any of the moves at Coco and that if I get voted out, you're not getting my vote. I'm going to make sure everyone knows the fact that they weren't your moves." All those type of stuff.

And I was like, damn that really hurts. Honestly, I feel like being a Survivor fan, I would think you'd have a little more respect for the game, and that's the game you got to play? I get that you're feeling cornered, but it just seemed unfair, and it hurt because we had had such a close relationship up to that point and I didn't understand why she was coming after me when there was three other people that were also going to be writing her name down.

As I was watching the Final Tribal Council and we see you apologize to her for that whole conversation, I was wondering if that was sincere or if you were just trying to score a vote. Or maybe both?

I think at the moment it was sincere, because looking back, I also felt nervous that vote, and I felt like a cornered animal as well. And I feel like the conversation just got really heated, and I did regret that it ended that way because looking back, we had worked together on so many votes and we had had such a close relationship and I really was sad. Looking at her on the jury, I'm sad that this is how it ended.

Also, obviously it really wasn't me pandering to her at that time. I did want her to know that I was sorry for that, but I was also hurt at the same time. So it was hard to make that apology because I did feel like that some of the things she had said really hurt me. But, at the same time, I did regret that. I didn't really have any regrets in the game, and she asked me that question specifically, and that is the one regret that I had had. And so I was just trying to be honest about that. Besides underestimating Gabler, that was my other regret.

Well, I think everyone did. So you walk into Tribal, you're feeling pretty confident. And then how did you feel during Tribal? Did it feel like it was slipping away to you?

It did a little bit. I think that I felt like people were really open to Gabler's answers and really supportive of what he was saying and just smiling. And, with me, it felt like they had already closed themselves off and it almost felt like it didn't matter what I said — they had already made up their minds in a way. I don't know if that's true, but that was how it felt. And so it was discouraging. And as you keep going on, and then people are jumping to Gabler's defense and then people are attacking me for things I'm saying, you start to lose confidence.

You're already under so much pressure and you're exhausted, you're tired, you just ate all this food and it put my body into shock. It was just a lot of hard things to overcome in that moment. And then you feel it slipping away, and it's difficult.

It's interesting you mentioned noticing the smiling and laughing when Gabler was talking, because I noticed the same thing. I was like, "Oh my God, this feels like Tony in Winners at War." Every time he was talking, the jury was eating it up. And I saw that with Gabler, and it really surprised me. I was like, "Wow, he has them." I didn't realize that was going to be the case.

Yeah, and it was crazy because I remember me and Owen looking at each other, because he was talking a lot. It almost felt to a point like he was rambling. He would just talk and talk and talk and talk, and was taking up so much of the time that Jeff had to even stop him for a second.

And so me and Owen were thinking, "Oh, man, he might be digging his grave even further," because to me he would just say a lot of stuff and I just didn't feel like a lot of it was like... But they were just really eating it up and I was just surprised. I feel like they had already made up their decision before they even came in the final Tribal is what I felt like. I don't know if that's true or not, but it was like fighting against this tide that was already turning

The thing I don't like about the concept of the fire-making competition is the winner of the final immunity challenge now not only gives someone else an opportunity to boost their résumé by winning at fire, but the challenge winner can also be punished by the jury for not giving up their immunity to compete in fire, which I think is absurd. Do you think this jury held that against you, because we saw Noelle ask you about it?

100 percent. That was definitely held against me, which it was just offensive honestly, because I earned that last challenge. That was a crazy amount of pressure to work under and the biggest immunity of the season. And I was so proud of myself, and I didn't feel like it was fair to basically say, "You have to give this up or you're not getting my vote. You have to risk it."

I think they were just upset that Jesse got out and that I was a part of a big reason why he got out because I made that decision. Because I think they all had their minds made up for Jesse to win, which I don't blame them. He was playing an incredible game. But once he was gone, I think they were looking at me like, "You're the reason, and you should have done this and that." And just trying to undermine my win and the fact that I got to make the decision to put Gabler in.

Obviously, Gabler made the fire, but I was a huge part in getting the biggest threat out of the game. And it hurt that they really felt like I had played such a bad game that I needed to Chris Underwood it, who wasn't even playing. He wasn't even in the game! So I just felt like that was unfair to hold that against me and to expect that of me, because if I had done that, how many people would be like, "This idiot!" Especially if I went out and I lost, because I wasn't that confident in my fire-making ability. And if I had lost that, I would've never lived that down.

I've talked to people like Mike Turner and Xander from recent seasons who went through this. How hard is it to go through all the emotions of that final Tribal Council, not have it go the way you hoped, and then have to sit there for a champagne toast and after-show? That has to be mental and emotional whiplash.

Oh my gosh, yeah. I think that was one of the hardest things to have to go through because truly I really felt very confident like I could win this. And for a lot of the game, I wasn't sure I was going to be capable of that. And so whenever it was right there in front of me and I really felt like I had played the best game considering who I was sitting next to, having to lose that and then go through this whole like, "Oh, we're happy! We're eating! We're drinking!"

I honestly drank way too much champagne just trying to deal with the shock, the pain and the loss of it. And then the next day, I remember I was at Ponderosa, I had a really bad panic attack, because it was just so much to go through within 24 hours, and there really was no time to process it. And so it was difficult. I wish that we had had that time to be able to come back and come together and discuss it. But it is what it is.

What about once you got some distance from it. Did it get easier, or is it still the type of thing you dwell on from time to time?

Yeah, it's something that I've gone through cycles with in my head. I think I've come to terms with it, and I've healed from it, and then I get upset all over again. I know people are like, "But you got to the end. You should be so proud." And I am. I really am, and I'm proud of the game I played. But to be that close and to really think you had it and then for it to slip away like that, you start questioning every little thing that you did. And it's hard to be proud of your wins unfortunately, because you were so close and you just missed out.

Because going into it, I wasn't sure that I was actually capable of what I did. And so to be that close, you want to be proud of yourself. At the same time, you're like, "Damn when am I ever going to get this chance again." And I've been watching it since I was a kid, so to be that close to being the winner… ugh! You doubt yourself a lot and you go back and look at all the things you could have done differently and it's a game that you'll never win in your head. But I'm still really proud of the game that I played no matter what.

Any moments or moves or anything that you wish it that made it to air that didn't?

Oh gosh, there's so much. I am sad that they didn't show a lot of the relationships and the alliances that I had made. I had planned to go to the end with Owen and Gabler the last, I want to say, 8 to 10 days. And we had worked together to slowly make that happen. And they didn't really show that, I think maybe to not make it too obvious. But I really wish that I had had more of my relationships and my strategic game shown in general. Because I worked really hard in that regard.

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